The cold weather can be harsh. You can bundle up, sit by a fire, or cuddle. You can also warm up with laughter. Read the funniest it’s so cold jokes.
Winter brings a lot of fun activities and memories. The snow falling from the clouds creates a beautiful winter wonderland.
Sometimes, it can become too cold. Winter temperatures can become harsh.
Alaska holds the record for the lowest temperature at -80°F in 1971.
Even if it’s not that cold, laughter can warm you up. The following are the funniest it’s so cold jokes.
The funniest it’s so cold jokes
1. It’s so cold that Lady Liberty put her torch inside her dress.
2. It’s so cold that when a police officer tells a criminal to freeze, they’re already frozen.
3. It’s so cold that Jack Frost changed his name to Jack Froze.
4. It’s so cold that dentures are chattering in the glass.
5. It’s so cold that the dog on a Greyhound bus was riding inside.
6. It’s so cold that trees are chopping themselves into firewood.
7. It’s so cold that women are begging for hot flashes.
8. It’s so cold that prisoners are begging for the electric chair.
9. It’s so cold that lawyers have their hands in their own pockets.
10. It’s so cold that I saw a line of chickens outside KFC waiting for their turn in the deep fryer.
11. It’s so cold that I’m wearing wool socks, three of them.
12. It’s so cold that priests want to go to hell.
13. It’s so cold that my snot froze, and I can’t breathe through my nose.
14. It’s so cold that it now makes sense why they call it cold, hard cash.
15. It’s so cold that my eyelids are frozen together.
16. It’s so cold that I milked the cows and got ice cream.
17. It’s so cold that even the ATM shows a minus.
18. It’s so cold that I farted snowflakes.
19. It’s so cold that even Elsa isn’t bothered by it.
20. It’s so cold that my shadow froze on the sidewalk.
21. It’s so cold that the local flasher had to describe themself.
22. It’s so cold that I chipped my tooth on my soup.
23. It’s so cold that my mocha latte turned into chocolate ice cream.
24. It’s so cold that my nipples could cut through diamonds.
25. It’s so cold that my heating bill is higher than my mortgage.
26. It’s so cold that optometrists are giving away ice scrapers with glasses.
27. It’s so cold that the local pet store is selling penguins.
28. It’s so cold that I had to break the smoke off the chimney.
29. It’s so cold that even Canadians admit that it’s cold.
30. It’s so cold that the faucet is pouring out ice cubes.
31. It’s so cold that I didn’t clean the house. I defrosted it.
32. It’s so cold that hitchhikers are holding up pictures of their thumbs.
33. It’s so cold that my lips froze together.
34. It’s so cold that I went into the fridge to warm up.
35. It’s so cold that polar bears are buying down jackets to stay warm.
36. It’s so cold that I brushed against a car and accidentally keyed it with my nipple.
37. It’s so cold that my mustache shattered when I laughed.
38. It’s so cold that dogs are wearing cats.
39. It’s so cold that when I needed local anesthesia, the dentist told me to stick my head out the window.
Related: When’s the best time to go to the dentist?
40. It’s so cold that we had to stop eating with metal silverware. People walked around for days with spoons and forks stuck to their tongues.
41. It’s so cold that my mail broke as I opened the envelope.
42. It’s so cold that dogs are getting stuck on fire hydrants.
43. It’s so cold that I saw a gangster pull his pants up.
44. It’s so cold that when I turned on the shower, it started hailing.
45. It’s so cold that sheep are demanding their wool back.
46. It’s so cold that I tried to take out the garbage, and it wouldn’t go.
47. It’s so cold that mice are playing hockey in the toilet.
48. It’s so cold that fish are jumping out of ice holes and into frying pans.
49. It’s so cold that travel agencies began marketing Alaska as a tropical vacation.
50. It’s so cold that hell is now freezing over.
51. It’s so cold that the rocks in my shoes are my toes.
52. It’s so cold that the internet froze.
53. It’s so cold that you can pick frozen fruit off the tree.
Related: Hilarious Science Jokes for Teachers and Students
Featured image by David Em/Humor Living.