100+ Skeleton Jokes You’ll Find Humerus

Your skeleton supports you as your structural frame. With 206 bones comes many chances for laughter. Read the funniest skeleton jokes.

Skeleton with its arms up.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

An adult human body has 206 bones, with 26 in the feet and 54 in the hands.

The longest bone in your body is the femur, the thigh bone.

Your skeleton supports your body. It allows you to move, protects your organs, and allows the attachment of muscles and tendons.

With it comes many opportunities for humor.

Whether learning about or dressing up as one, get a laugh with the following skeleton jokes.

Related: What do you call a man with no shins?

The funniest skeleton jokes

1. Where do young skeletons go to learn?

Skull.

2. What does a skeleton say while serving a meal?

Bone App├ętit.

Skeleton dancing.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

3. Why did the skeleton leave the party?

It had no body to dance with.

4. Why couldn’t the skeleton eat spicy foods?

It didn’t have the stomach for it.

5. How do skeletons ask for an opportunity?

Chest give me a chance.

6. What do skeletons do at ice hockey games?

Drive the zam-boney.

7. Why did the two skeletons break up?

Their hearts weren’t in it.

8. Why do skeletons always laugh at skeleton jokes?

They find them humerus.

9. What do you call a skeleton without friends?

Bone-ly.

10. What does a skeleton interrogator say?

Talus the truth.

11. Why are skeletons good at geometry?

They always know the radius.

12. What does a skeleton use to cut things?

A shoulder blade.

13. Why did the skeleton take acting classes?

It wants tibia movie star.

14. How do skeletons express their love for each other?

I love every bone in your body.

15. What do you call it when a skeleton throws up?

Vomer-t.

16. What do skeletons say before playing music?

Ulna one, ulna two, ulna one, two, three.

Skeleton.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

17. What do skeletons say when someone leaves on a journey?

Bone voyage.

18. How did the skeleton know something was going to happen?

It could feel it in its bones.

19. Why do skeletons save money?

Incus of an emergency.

20. In which lane do skeletons drive?

The carpal lane.

21. What’s a skeleton’s favorite form of art?

Skull-pture.

22. What do skeletons dress up as for Halloween?

Humans.

23. Who’s the King of Rock and Roll for skeletons?

Pelvis.

24. How do skeletons go hunting?

They use a bone and marrow.

25. What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument?

A trom-bone.

26. Why can’t skeletons play church music?

They don’t have organs.

27. Why wasn’t the skeleton convicted of a crime?

They only had sacrum-stantial evidence.

28. What do skeletons do during a concert?

A gui-tarsal-o.

Related: What concert costs only 45 cents?

29. What kind of candy sent the skeleton to the hospital?

Jawbreakers.

30. Why do skeletons hate the cold?

It sends chills up their spine.

31. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?

It didn’t have the guts.

32. Why can’t skeletons fly over Area 51?

It’s a no-fly bone.

33. What do you call a lie told by a skeleton?

A fib-ula.

34. Why did the skeleton order at the bar?

A beer and a mop.

35. What do you call an incompetent skeleton?

A bonehead.

36. Where does a skeleton work?

The lumbar yard.

37. Where do skeletons buy things?

The body shop.

38. Why can’t skeletons work in mines?

They only go six feet under.

39. What’s a skeleton’s favorite line from Shakespeare?

Tibia or not tibia.

Tibia bone.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

40. Why did the skeleton get in trouble?

It was bad to the bone.

41. Who’s the best skeleton detective?

Sherlock Bones.

42. How did skeletons send mail in the old days?

The bony express.

43. What’s a skeleton’s favorite phrase?

To each their bone.

44. What’s a skeleton’s favorite fruit?

A spine-apple.

45. On which island do skeletons live?

Thoracic Park.

46. Where do teenage skeletons learn?

High skull.

47. What do Japanese skeletons use for toppings?

Bone-ito flakes.

48. What’s a skeleton’s favorite cooking utensil?

A scapula.

49. What kind of nuts do skeletons eat?

W-ulna-ts.

50. What do skeletons wear when it rains?

A bone-cho.

51. How much does a skeleton weigh?

One skele-ton.

52. Why do skeletons do whatever they feel like doing?

They’re s-bone-taneous.

53. Why can’t you rely on a skeleton?

They’re irres-bone-sible.

54. Why do you call a formal large meal for skeletons?

A bone-quet.

55. Where do skeletons live?

Ur-bone areas.

56. How do skeletons start a story?

Once u-bone a time.

57. Did you hear about the skeleton beauty contest?

Nobody won.

58. What did an upset skeleton say to the other?

You’re dead to me.

59. What do you get after patting a skeleton on its back?

A spinal tap.

60. Where do skeletons go for a fun night out?

Anywhere, as long as it’s a hip joint.

61. Why do skeletons have short memories?

It’s a no-brainer.

62. What happens if a skeleton stands too close to a fire?

They become bone dry.

63. What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?

Will you marrow me?

64. What kind of pan does a skeleton use?

A skull-et.

65. What do you call a skeleton rock band?

Bone Jovi.

66. What kind of chocolate do skeletons eat?

Bone-bones.

67. Why did the skeleton lay in the sun?

To get a skele-tan.

68. What’s a skeleton’s favorite type of chili?

Ha-bone-ro.

69. What does a skeleton say if it’s already done something?

Bone there, done that.

70. What do you give a skeleton after an injury?

A bone-dage.

71. What do skeletons eat for breakfast?

Eggs bone-dict.

72. What does a Vietnamese skeleton eat?

A bone-mi.

73. What do you call a taunting skeleton?

A skele-taunt.

74. How do skeletons make s’mores?

They use a bone-fire.

75. What’s do you call a teenage skeleton?

A skele-teen.

Skeleton.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

76. What do you call the skeleton of a French emporer?

Napoleon Bone-aparte.

77. What do you call a loud skeleton in the middle of the night?

A distur-bone-ce.

78. What do skeletons stay in when camping?

Skele-tents.

79. What’s it called when a skeleton parent is rebuking their kids?

Skull-ding.

80. What do you call a skeleton that knows how to do a lot of things?

Skull-ful.

81. What do you call a skeleton who’s the lead vocalist in a rock band?

Bone-o.

82. Why aren’t criminal skeletons afraid of the police?

They can’t pin anything on them.

83. What’s the most common complaint from skeletons?

Achy bones.

84. What do you call a skeleton that won’t work?

Lazy bones.

85. What did the skeleton say to the vampire?

You suck.

86. What do you call a skeleton that rings a doorbell?

A dead ringer.

87. What’s the coolest part of a skeleton?

Its hip.

88. Why are skeletons terrible liars?

You can see right through them.

89. Why did the skeleton go above and beyond in school?

To get bone-us points.

90. Where do skeletons keep pet birds?

In their rib cage.

Rib cage.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

91. What’s a skeleton’s favorite drink?

Milk because it’s good for the bones.

92. How do French skeletons greet each other?

Bone-jour!

93. Why did the skeleton start a fight?

It had a bone to pick.

94. What do skeletons do in their free time?

Watch skull-ivision.

95. Why did the skeleton ride a motorcycle?

It was bone to be wild.

96. What’s a skeleton’s favorite tree?

A bone-sai.

97. How do you reach a skeleton?

Call them on their skull-phone.

98. How do you make a skeleton laugh?

Tickle its funny bone.

99. What do skeletons order at restaurants?

Spare ribs.

100. Why did the skeleton climb the tree?

A dog was after its bones.

101. Do you know about the skeleton that’s not cool?

It doesn’t have a hip bone in its body.

102. Why are skeletons so calm?

Nothing gets under their skin.

Related: Hilarious Cowboy Jokes From the Wild West

Featured image by David Em/Humor Living.