35+ Best Green Jokes

Green is a color that represents growth, harmony, health, and new beginnings. Read hilarious green jokes for a laugh when you see the color.

Paint splatter.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

Grass, emeralds, spinach, money, and frogs have one thing in common. They’re all green.

It’s a fresh color that reminds you of nature. The color green relaxes your mind and boosts your mood.

It’s an excellent color that also comes with a lot of humor.

The following are hilarious green jokes to make you laugh.

Hilarious green jokes

1. Why did the Granny Smith apple turn red?

It saw the salad dressing.

2. Who’s Hulk’s favorite band?

Green Day.

3. How can you tell if a person wearing green is happy?

They’ll be green-ing from ear to ear.

Abstract design.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

4. What did the green light say to the red light?

Don’t look. I’m changing.

5. What’s green and known as the King of Rock ‘n’ Roll?

Elvis Parsley.

6. What did the green tea say to its significant other?

We’re a matcha made in heaven.

7. What did one green citrus fruit say to the other?

Lime yours.

8. What’s green and smells like yellow paint?

Green paint.

9. Why do leprechauns love to garden?

They have green thumbs.

10. What did dark green say to its spouse?

Olive you so much.

11. Why did the green vegetable say to its haters?

Don’t kale my vibe.

12. Which green character doesn’t like Christmas?

The Green-ch.

13. What’s Bruce Lee’s green brother’s name?

Brock Lee.

14. What’s green and makes people feel better?

Encourage-mint.

15. Why isn’t Hulk green anymore?

Green jokes made him laugh, so he was not angry.

16. Why don’t green grapes get lonely?

They’re always in bunches.

17. What’s green, and bad for your teeth?

A green brick.

18. Why were the green beans so happy?

They found inner peas.

19. Why do leprechauns ride bicycles instead of driving cars?

They’re all about being green.

20. What do you call a green diamond?

A shamrock.

Shamrock.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

21. How did the green vegetable ask the other to be honest?

Put your chards on the table.

22. How do you save what your device is showing?

Take a s-green-shot.

23. What should you do if you see a green alien?

Wait for it to ripen.

24. Why didn’t the green frog show up to the party?

It frog-ot.

25. What’s green and fun to watch on TV?

Teal or No Teal.

26. What advice did the green plant give?

Cactus makes perfect.

27. What did the green plant say to motivate the team?

It ain’t clover till it’s clover.

28. What do you call someone that’s green and wise?

A sage.

29. What did the ivy say to the grass?

I’m green with envy.

Ivy plant.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

30. How do green succulents greet each other?

Aloe!

31. What’s green and smart?

A green-ius.

32. What does a green and nosey pepper do?

It gets jalapeƱo business.

33. Why did the green vegetable get a new job?

To get a higher celery.

34. What do you call two green plants that always hang out?

Best fern-ds.

35. Which falcon is green and fast?

A pere-green falcon.

36. Which branch of medicine did the leprechaun study?

Endo-green-ology.

Leprechaun.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

37. When do you go on red and stop at green?

A watermelon.

38. What did the green grape say to the purple grape?

Breathe!

Related: Jokes About Blue

Featured image by David Em/Humor Living.

David Em.

David Em

David Em is the founder of Humor Living. He launched Humor Living to create a destination for you to visit anytime you need a laugh. Whether you’re looking for jokes, puns, memes, or funny stories, Humor Living is the place to be.