Narcissists have an excessive interest in themselves. Read funny narcissist quotes to laugh or have a comeback for one.
Narcissists think others are inferior, and they seek admiration.
They also lack empathy for others. Scientists refer to them as having a pattern of grandiosity.
If you’re ready to laugh, read the following narcissist quotes. They’re also perfect if you want to say something hilarious to or about one.
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The ultimate list of funny narcissist quotes
1. “Nobody can be kinder than the narcissist while you react to life in his own terms.” -Elizabeth Bowen
2. “One thing a narcissist doesn’t like is to look in a mirror that is in any way genuinely reflective of what’s on the other side of it.” -Jay Parini
3. “There’s a reason narcissists don’t learn from mistakes, and that’s because they never get past the first step, which is admitting that they made one.” -Jeffrey Kluger
4. “No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.” -Tucker Max
5. “Teens have a sensational narcissism and genuinely believe that their experiences are unique and can’t be explained to adults. But we forgive them for their mistakes and naïveté.” -Stephanie Savage
6. “Twitter is the marriage of full-tilt narcissism and full-tilt voyeurism that has finally collided in 140 words.” -Adam Goldberg
7. “The only principle that governs their mind is the question, ‘How do I look?'” -Haruki Murakami
8. “A narcissist paints a picture of themselves as being the victim or innocent in all aspects. They will be offended by the truth. But what is done in the dark will come to light. Time has a way of showing people’s true colors.” -Karla Grimes
9. “Narcissus does not fall in love with his reflection because it is beautiful but because it is his. If it were his beauty that enthralled him, he would be set free in a few years by its fading.” -W. H. Auden
10. “It is especially painful when narcissists suffer memory loss because they are losing parts of the person they love most.” -David Brooks
11. “They call it a selfie because ‘narcissistie’ is too hard to spell.” -Unknown
12. “Do you know what your problem is? You don’t know that you’re the problem.” -Unknown
13. “You can teach a narcissist to show up on time, but you can’t train them to listen once they get there.” -Ramani Durvasula
14. “Narcissus weeps to find that his Image does not return his love.” -Mason Cooley
15. “Sorry for forgetting I only exist when you want something.” -Unknown
16. “Now, I’m no astronomer, but even I’m pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun, not you.” -Unknown
17. “Withhold admiration from a narcissist and be disliked. Give it and be treated with indifference.” -Mason Cooley
18. “Narcissists, however, are similar to a spider that has built a web for its prey to bring itself.” -Mwanandeke Kindembo
19. “A narcissist’s criticism is their autobiography.” -M. Wakefield
20. “Narcissists are emotional porcupines, watch out for the quills!” -Tracy A. Malone
21. “Every narcissist is a hero and a legend in his own mind.” -Oscar Auliq-Ice
22. “That’s the thing about narcissists. They can try to fool you, with all their heart, but in the end, they’re just fooling themselves.” -Ellie Fox
23. “No sponge in the world could beat your abilities of self-absorption.” -Unknown
24. “You must be exhausted from all that ego-lifting.” -Unknown
25. “You consider yourself your most fascinating subject.” -Brit Bennett
26. “The narcissist would love nothing more than to know you are eating uncooked Top Ramen out of a dumpster for dinner tonight while wearing yesterday’s underwear.” -Tina Swithin
27. “Narcissism is voluntary blindness, an agreement not to look beneath the surface.” -Sam Keen
28. “If you live your life like everything is about you, you will be left with just that: just you.” -Unknown
29. “Narcissism is a disease. Get well soon.” -Unknown
30. “I don’t care what you think unless it is about me.” -Kurt Cobain
31. “Feed your ego yourself. I’m busy doing important things.” -Unknown
32. “Unfortunately, narcissism is not a crime. You’re free to go.” -Unknown
33. “How starved you must have been that my heart became a meal for your ego.” -Amanda Torroni
34. “Please repair your narcissism before you start loving your neighbor as yourself.” -Charles F. Glassman
35. “I mean, if a narcissist can’t recognize he’s a narcissist, how on earth do you treat his narcissism?” -Elle Kennedy
36. “He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.” -Benjamin Franklin
37. “Narcissistic love is riding on the rollercoaster of disaster filled with a heart full of tears.” -Sheree Griffin
38. “You’ll never win a fight with someone who only lives in his reality.” -Unknown
39. “Narcissist: A polite term for a self-serving, manipulative, evil jerk with no soul or compassion.” -Unknown
40. “Narcissists rewrite history to escape accountability.” -Unknown
41. “How many narcissists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they don’t use lightbulbs, they use gaslighting!” -Unknown
42. “A narcissistic personality disorder is the only mental condition where the patient is left alone, but everyone else needs treatment.” -Unknown
43. “There may be no ‘I’ in ‘team,’ but there are three in ‘narcissist!'” -Unknown
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Featured image by David Em/Humor Living.