100+ Funny Inspirational Quotes on Life and Work

Motivation is essential for achieving your goals. Add humor, and you have the best combination. Read funny inspirational quotes for a good laugh.

Silhouette of a person hiking.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

Inspiration is the key to progress, decisions, and well-being. There are many reasons for inspiration, as it benefits all aspects of your life. You can have health, personal, spiritual, and financial goals.

When learning about ways to achieve your goals, inspiration improves your knowledge. Whether you need a boost or a reminder to keep going, read the following inspirational quotes. They’re also funny, so you’ll get a good laugh from them.

Hilarious inspirational quotes

1. “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.” -Mark Twain

2. “Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.” -Kyle Chandler

3. “My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.” -Dave Barry

4. “You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” -Jack London

5. “Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.” -Josh Billings

6. “I have to be successful because I like expensive things.” -Lisa Lieberman-Wang

Funny inspirational quote by Lisa Lieberman-Wang.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

7. “To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.” -Reba McEntire

8. “Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” -Dale Carnegie

9. “Education is learning what you didn’t even know you didn’t know.” -Daniel J. Boorstin

10. “I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.” -Ron White

11. “When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on.” -Franklin D. Roosevelt

12. “Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting.” -Christopher Morley

13. “Get action. Seize the moment. Man was never intended to become an oyster.” -Theodore Roosevelt

14. “Establishing goals is all right if you don’t let them deprive you of interesting detours.” -Doug Larson

15. “The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score.” -Bill Copeland

16. “The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised.” -George Will

17. “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” -Bernard M. Baruch

18. “Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” -Will Rogers

19. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” -Zig Ziglar

20. “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” -A. A. Milne

21. “You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.” -Sam Levenson

22. “Aspire to inspire before we expire.” -Eugene Bell Jr.

23. “It’s always too early to quit.” -Norman Vincent Peale

24. “You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute.” -Tina Fey

Funny inspirational quote by Tina Fey.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

25. “A peacock that rests on his tail feathers is just another turkey.” -Dolly Parton

26. “Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” -Charles Dickens

27. “Hope for the best. Expect the worst. Life is a play. We’re unrehearsed.” -Mel Brooks

28. “Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it’s a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope, and that enables you to laugh at life’s realities.” -Dr. Seuss

29. “A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.” -Frank Zappa

30. “If you hang out with chickens, you’re going to cluck and if you hang out with eagles, you’re going to fly.” -Steve Maraboli

31. “Change is not a four letter word… but often your reaction to it is!” -Jeffrey Gitomer

32. “Courage is being scared to death… and saddling up anyway.” -John Wayne

33. “Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex… It takes a touch of genius – and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.” -E. F. Schumacher

34. “Tell the negative committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up.” -Ann Bradford

35. “Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.” -Steven Wright

36. “One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.” -Rita Mae Brown

37. “Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.” -Unknown

38. “If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.” -Claude McDonald

39. “Be pleasant until ten o’clock in the morning and the rest of the day will take care of itself.” -Elbert Hubbard

40. “A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.” -Mark Twain

41. “Change before you have to.” -Jack Welch

42. “I know worrying works, because none of the stuff I worried about ever happened.” -Will Rogers

43. “Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.” -Bill Murray

44. “The bad news is time flies. The good news is you’re the pilot.” -Michael Altshuler

45. “Your attitude is like a box of crayons that color your world. Constantly color your picture gray, and your picture will always be bleak. Try adding some bright colors to the picture by including humor, and your picture begins to lighten up.” -Allen Klein

46. “We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” -Oscar Wilde

47. “When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” -Cathy Guiswite

48. “If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.” -Theodore Roosevelt

Funny inspirational quote by Theodore Roosevelt.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

49. “I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.” -George Bernard Shaw

50. “When someone says you can’t do it. Do it twice and take pictures.” -Unknown

51. “You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?” -Steven Wright

52. “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.” -Truman Capote

53. “To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk.” -Thomas A. Edison

54. “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.” -W. C. Fields

55. “Success is simply a matter of luck. Ask any failure.” -Earl Wilson

56. “You can’t shine like a diamond, if you not willing to get cut like a diamond!” -Eric Thomas

57. “So long as your desire to explore is greater than your desire to not screw up, you’re on the right track.” -Ed Helms

58. “Say and do something positive that will help the situation; it doesn’t take any brains to complain.” -Robert A. Cook

59. “The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it.” -Arnold H. Glasow

60. “The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up.” -Paul Valery

61. “Never follow anyone else’s path, unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost.” -Ellen DeGeneres

62. “Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose.” -Bill Gates

63. “Age is of no importance unless you are a cheese.” -Billie Burke

64. “Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.” -Abraham Lincoln

65. “When you do not know what you are doing and what you are doing is the best – that is inspiration.” -Robert Bresson

66. “When something goes wrong in your life just yell ‘PLOT TWIST’, and move on.” -Molly Weis

67. “Here is the test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: if you’re alive, it isn’t.” -Richard Bach

68. “Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.” -Erma Bombeck

69. “Never forget that only dead fish swim with the stream.” -Malcolm Muggeridge

70. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” -Thomas Edison

71. “Live each day like it’s your second to the last. That way you can fall asleep at night.” -Jason Love

72. “Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds.” -Gordon B. Hinckley

73. “If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree.” -Jim Rohn

74. “Be thine own palace, or the world’s thy jail.” -John Donne

75. “It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.” -Robert Benchly

76. “Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.” -Salvador Dali

77. “Life itself still remains a very effective therapist.” -Karen Horney

78. “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” -Robin Williams

Funny inspirational quote by Robin Williams.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

79. “I only hope that we don’t lose sight of one thing – that it was all started by a mouse.” -Walt Disney

80. “The wise does at once what the fool does at last.” -Baltasar Gracian

81. “Expect problems and eat them for breakfast.” -Alfred A. Montapert

82. “Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget tossing in the lifeboats.” -Voltaire

83. “I didn’t fail the test, I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.” -Benjamin Franklin

84. “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” -Abraham Lincoln

85. “Try to be like the turtle – at ease in your own shell.” -Bill Copeland

86. “A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future.” -Denis Waitley

87. “Haters are just confused admirers because they can’t figure out the reason why everyone loves you.” -Jeffree Star

88. “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” -Elbert Hubbard

89. “We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don’t know.” -W. H. Auden

90. “Luck is what you have left over after you give 100 percent.” -Langston Coleman

91. “I cannot afford to waste my time making money.” -Louis Agassiz

92. “Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.” -Terry Pratchett

93. “If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?” -George Carlin

94. “Life is like a sewer: what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.” -Tom Lehrer

95. “f you’re going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now.” -Marie Osmond

96. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” -Charles M. Schulz

Funny inspirational quote by Charles M. Schulz.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

97. “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” -Betty Reese

98. “The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.” -Maureen Dowd

99. “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.” -Robert Bloch

100. “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” -Joe Girard

101. “If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.” -Yogi Berra

102. “I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book.” -Groucho Marx

103. “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” -Lily Tomlin

Related: Funny New York Jokes to Make You Laugh

Featured image by David Em/Humor Living.

David Em.

David Em

David Em is the founder of Humor Living. He launched Humor Living to create a destination for you to visit anytime you need a laugh. Whether you’re looking for jokes, puns, memes, or funny stories, Humor Living is the place to be.