70+ Hilarious Poop Jokes That Don’t Stink

Poop is a part of human and animal life. Toilet humor wouldn’t be the same without poop jokes. So, read the funniest ones for a good laugh.

Poop emoji.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

Poop is essential because it gets rid of waste from your body.

Since everyone does it, everyone can relate to poop humor.

Even the pile of poop is one of the most popular emojis.

No matter your age, laugh with the following poop jokes.

Funny poop jokes

1. How do you get into a locked bathroom if you really need to go poop?

Use a doo-key.

2. Poop jokes aren’t my favorite.

But they’re a solid number two.

Pile of poop.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

3. What did the poop say to the fart?

You blow me away.

4. Why don’t people like poop jokes?

They stink.

5. Did you hear about the movie about constipation?

It never came out.

6. When’s the best time to go to the bathroom?

Poo-thirty.

7. Why was the poop sad?

It got dumped.

8. Did you know diarrhea is hereditary?

It runs in your genes.

9. How does a clown’s poop smell?

Funny.

10. What do you call a fairy after it poops?

Stinkerbell.

11. Why did the toilet paper stop rolling?

It got stuck in a crack.

12. Why did the baker’s hands turn brown?

They kneaded poop.

13. Which poop movie in the trilogy is the worst?

The turd one.

14. Do you know about constipated accountants?

They can’t budget.

15. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

To get to the bottom.

16. Did you hear about the constipated math teacher?

They worked it out with a pencil.

17. What do you call a poop that does magic tricks?

Poodini.

18. Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh.

19. Why did they release the movie about diarrhea early?

It was leaked.

Person sitting on a toilet.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

20. Did you hear about the constipated composer?

They had problems with their last movement.

21. What do you get when you poop in your overalls?

Dung-arees.

22. What do poop-shaped doorbells sound like?

Ding dung.

23. What did one fly say to the other?

Is this stool taken?

24. What’s brown and sounds like a bell?

Dung.

25. Why can’t you trust people that are constipated?

They’re full of crap.

26. What did the toilet paper say after being flushed?

I feel really wiped.

27. What did the bottle of conditioner do on the toilet?

Shampooed.

28. Why does Piglet stink?

He plays with Pooh.

29. What’s the best day to poop?

Turd-ay.

30. What’s another name for cow poop?

Moo-nure.

31. What does one butt cheek say to the other?

Between you and me, something stinks.

32. Which animal is known for its poop?

Turd-les.

33. How does your day go when you have diarrhea?

Crappy.

34. Why didn’t the soldier flush the toilet?

It wasn’t their duty.

35. What did the big cat say after the other wouldn’t stop telling jokes?

Stop making me laugh. I’m going to puma pants.

36. Did you poop?

I dung know.

37. What’s big, brown, and behind the wall?

Humpty’s dump.

38. What happens when the captain of a ship goes poop?

They leave the captain’s log.

Poop.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

39. What happens when you eat too much alphabet soup?

You get the biggest vowel movement ever.

40. What do you call a planet that poops?

Uranus.

41. What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?

A salad shooter.

42. What happens to a weasel with diarrhea?

Poop goes the weasel.

43. What’s a surfer’s second greatest fear?

A shart attack.

44. Why did the person bring toilet paper to the party?

They were a party pooper.

45. What’s the definition of a surprise?

A fart with a lump in it.

46. Why did the volcano explode?

It couldn’t find the lava-tory.

47. Why did the person pick up poop?

It was their doodie.

48. Why do you have to inspect your dog’s poop after picking it up?

To doo your doo diligence.

49. What do you call a wizard with diarrhea?

Harry Poop-er.

50. Why do people with diarrhea laugh easily at jokes?

They can’t hold it in.

51. What sound does poop make when it disappears?

S-poop-f.

52. What does a baby’s cry sound like after pooping?

Poo-hoo.

53. Where do football players have the biggest poop?

The Super Bowl.

54. What do you call Clark Kent with diarrhea?

Pooperman.

55. Do you want to know five facts about poop?

Number two will surprise you.

56. Why do people have a hard time saying constipation?

They struggle with getting it out.

57. Someone stole the toilets at the police station.

The cops have nothing to go on.

58. What kind of dog poops a lot?

The poodle.

59. What are the reasons people love toilets?

Number one and number two.

60. Which play causes most basketball players to poop?

The slam dung.

61. What do you call poop in heaven?

Holy crap.

62. What do you call someone who keeps pooping?

Re-dung-ant.

63. What does a poop gun sound like?

Poo. Poo.

64. Why did everyone surround the poop?

It was poop-ular.

65. What do you call someone searching for a toilet?

In poo-suit.

Pile of poop.
Photo by David Em/Humor Living.

66. Where does a keyboard poop?

In the com-poo-ter.

67. How did the poop do in the race?

It came in turd.

68. Why did the poop cross the road?

To get to the toilet.

69. How do you have a digital poop?

By using a cr-app.

70. How did the ice cream maker end up with brown ice cream?

They made poop-sicles.

71. What do you call someone who can change their poop?

A mani-poo-lator.

72. What do you call a famous YouTuber that poops?

PooDiePie.

73. What do you call a marvelous poop?

Pooper-dooper.

Related: Funny Toilet Paper Jokes

Featured image by David Em/Humor Living.

David Em.

David Em

David Em is the founder of Humor Living. He launched Humor Living to create a destination for you to visit anytime you need a laugh. Whether you’re looking for jokes, puns, memes, or funny stories, Humor Living is the place to be.